Perplexity of the Naptime Tradition
For some time I have been given to deferring to tradition in the matter of daytime napping. It has been my position that I should honor the longstanding practice of taking a mid-day siesta, for to not do so would be to question the traditions of my forebears, and so call in to question the very foundations of civil society.
There is a place and a time for honoring tradition, but there is also a place for the questioning of hidebound practices that have lost their practicality in today’s milieu. After careful consideration I have determined that the naptime, as practiced in today’s society, is one such tradition that is no longer of service to the thinking man. As a thinking man myself, for so I imagine my own capacity for perspicacity, I feel that I am not in need of a period of rest in the middle of an otherwise productive day of wakefulness.
To this end I have proffered my intentions and tendered my objections to those in charge of such matters, but to no avail. Given that the powers-that-be have ignored my entreaties insofar as they have understood them I have entered into a period of rebellion, where I am steadfast in my refusal to lie prostrate before all in submission to brutal tyranny.
Rebellion as Celebration
My public demonstrations are not dour affairs of bitter venting and gnashing of teeth, but more a celebration of the inalienable rights of Man as imagined during the Enlightenment, a period of our history that I feel speaks most directly to my current situation vis-a-vis the naptime dilemma.
I tell you this in hopes that you might wish to join me in my peaceful remonstrances and help to make enforced slumberage but a memory from a dark and troubling past. My “wake-ins” occur every day at 1pm and involve much laughter, giggling, pounding, and stomping. The throwing of bedding onto the floor is also a frequent occurrence at these demonstrations, although great care is taken to prevent injury to the innocent.
I hope to see you soon on the front lines of this battle for freedom. I cannot type any more as I am currently so sleepy I must needs find my bed and lie thereupon.